The American Poet

Oliver Wendell Holmes once said; Many people die with their music still in them. Too often it is because they are always getting ready to live…Before they know it…time runs out.

I said it before, in my friendster blog, and i'm gonna say it again:

Live life to the fullest..don't live in the past..if it's time to move on..do so before time beats u at it. Life's too short, don't waste it. Your whole future is still ahead of u, if u keep on staying in the past, how on earth are u gonna grow? How on earth are u gonna know what's in store for u? How on earth will u know what u might have missed out on, all this while not moving on. Mistakes are made. Ever so often u regret making that mistake - any mistake for that matter. And so u learn from your mistakes. I may not be the brightest or the wisest, but i do know that making mistakes is a good thing, cos it is through these mistakes that u discover the path to righteousness. So don't be afraid of making mistakes, else how would u learn?

***For those of u who don't know, Oliver Wendell Holmes is a famous American poet. Born in 1809, he shares the same birthdate as me - August the 29th***

Change

Have u ever felt like chopping off ur legs cos they hurt too much? I stood for so long today, my feet are aching! I wish i had a foot spa or something, but i dont. *sigh* It was one of those saturday nites at work today, very very busy, and i only reached home at almost 1am! I haven't been that late in a long time!

Anyways, jumping to another topic altogether, i know a lot of people who are goin thru a rough time in their life. On one hand, i symphatize for them, but on the other hand, life's never a smooth ride, it always has its ups and downs. I believe it's hard to tell someone to do something, when u yourself is not the one experiencing the situation. It's easier said than done. But watever it is, i also believe that u should always have faith in your self, n be strong! If u have even the slightest ray of hope, hold on to that hope, n don't ever let it go. If u give up now, u never know what might have happened.

However, everything around u is bound to change at one point or another. You can never live ur life in that one particular way forever. Things change. People change. Feelings change. Having said that, it comes a time when u have to eventually move on. Change is the law of life, and those who look only to the past or present are certain to miss the future.

I'm rich~!! are you?

i know..i know..i haven't been blogging..but i have valid reasons!! heaps of assignments, late nites at work, lack of sleep. Can u believe, i've actually had quite a few nites, where i only slept like 2 or 3 hours, then no sleep/rest during the day..its totally insane! but i had no choice. Exam's round the corner, so its time to buck up in studies! not intending to flunk anything *crossing fingers*

was watching something on tv the other nite, n the guy was talking about being rich. how do u qualify someone or urself to be rich? most of the people would say that riches are measured by the amount of money u have, or the property u own and so forth. But this guy said that he isn't rich because of any of those things. He was rich because he had such a great family - they loved one another, stuck with each other despite their ridiculous behaviours/actions, and they grew closer every single day. A family is without a doubt the most valuable asset in ur life. Don't ever leave ur family, they are the one thing u should keep close to ur heart, cos everyone else might hate u in this world, but no one else would stick by u like ur family would.

Friends

Friends. A simple word isn't it? It's uttered everyday to almost every person imaginable. Who are your friends? I used to think that friends were the people that you could laugh and talk to.

Now I know that friends aren't that, they're the people that touch ur heart. You could spend hours with them doing nothing at all and it can be the best time of your life, just becuase it was with them. They're the people you can share your secrets with, cry with, laugh with, and just have fun with. They don't judge you or make you change. They accept you exactly as you are. They look at you and they see a great person, one they love spending time with. We all share something in common and are tied together by memories, tears, laughs and smiles. We're tied together by love for the other.

Friendship is the strangest but greatest thing in the world. I find my time with my friends, the best times of my life. My friends are my heart, my soul, my fun, my laughter, tears, love and my life.

Friendship is the hardest thing in the world to explain. It's not something you learn in school. But if you haven't learned the meaning of friendship, you really haven't learned anything.

Choose life.

Choose Life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family. Choose a fucking big television, choose washing machines, cars, compact disc players and electrical tin openers. Choose good health, low cholesterol, and dental insurance. Choose fixed interest mortage repayments. Choose a starter home. Choose your friends. Choose leisurewear and matching luggage. Choose a three-piece suite on hire purchase in a range of fucking fabrics. Choose DIY and wondering who the fuck you are on a Sunday morning. Choose sitting on that couch watching mind-numbing, spirit-crushing game shows, stuffing fucking junk food into your mouth. Choose rotting away at the end of it all, pishing your last in a miserable home, nothing more than an embarrassment to the selfish, fucked up brats you spawned to replace yourself.

Choose your future.

Choose life.

*John Hodge*

I want to...

I want to go to McDonald's and think that it's a four star restaurant. I want to sail sticks across a fresh mud puddle and make ripples with rocks. I want to think M&Ms are better than money, because you can eat them. I want to return to a time when life was simple, when all you knew were colours, addition tables and simple nursery rhymes. But that didn't bother you, because you didn't know what you didn't know and you didn't care. When all you knew was to be happy because you didn't know all the things that should make you worried and upset. I want to think that the world is fair. That everyone in it is honest and good. I want to believe that anything is possible. Somewhere in my youth...I matured and I learned too much. I learned of nuclear weapons, war, prejudice, starvation and abused children. I learned of lies, unhappy marriages, illness, pain and death. I learned of a world where children knew how to kill...and did. I want to be oblivious to the complexity of life and be overly excited by little things once again. I want to return to the days when reading was fun and music was clean, when television was used to report the news or for family entertainment and not to promote sex, violence and deceit. I remember being naive and thinking that everyone was happy because I was. I would walk on the beach and think of the sand between my toes and the prettiest seashell I could find. I would spend my afternoon climbing trees and riding my bike. I want to live simple again. I don't want my day to consist of mountains of paperwork, depressing news, how to survive more days in the month than there is money in the bank, doctor bills, gossip, illness and loss of loved ones. I want to believe in the power of smiles, hugs, a kind word, truth, justice, peace, dreams, the imagination, mankind and making angels in the snow.
I want to be 6 again.

...discovering yourself...

The journey of discovering yourself is a never ending journey. I'm pretty sure everyone's step foot on this path towards discovery. However, the question is, how far have u gone?

Along that journey, u will learn that ur life is made up of grains of sand. It's like a jigsaw puzzle. U discover urself piece by piece..till one day, u'll get the big picture. Some of us find something bad in our lives, n strive our very best to change it, to be a new person. And u try to forget the past. But isn't who u were, part of who u are? Sometimes, u don't really need to be the person u used to be, as much as the person u're trying to be. Don't u think so?

People ARE gonna disappoint u, u CAN expect that. But what if u wake up one day and u ARE the disappointment?

something to think about.

Antagonism

There seems to be a kind of order in the universe, in the movement of the stars, and the turning of the earth, the changing of the seasons. But human life is almost pure chaos! Everyone takes his stance, asserts his own rights and feelings, mistaking the motives of others, and his own.

Everything that happens, happens for a reason. It's simply an antagonistic reaction between two scenarios or situations...there's always a cause and an effect, an answer to every question, a reason to trust behind every doubt.

It's hard...

It's hard to fight the things we are afraid of. Sometimes we just need a little help.

I got this from somewhere. Can't remember exactly where. I think that's so true. So if anyone, anytime, ever needs a little help, just know that I'm here, u might not think so, but I am..truly.

cruelty?

have u ever wondered how cruel life can be? it's only when u miss out on something that's supposed to be ever so meaningful..or when u lose something/someone who had a big impact on ur life that u finally come to ur senses to actually realise that YES life is indeed cruel~!

it causes u the misery, the pain, the suffering, the wondering, the hurt, the tears, the longing, every possible emotion along those lines.

well i have no right to question God and his works, the only thing i CAN do is pray..n continue praying that each n every one of us, me included will be blessed with a beautiful life..that we may find true meaning in our lives, find the reason for living, n to find out God's plan for us.

i thought this was nice:

"As happens sometimes, a moment settled, and hovered, and remained for much more than a moment. And sound stopped and movement stopped for much, much more than a moment. And then the moment was gone."
-from the book "Of Mice and Men" by John Steinback.

-n/a-

i've been reasonably busy lately and that's the reason i never got the chance to actually sit down n blog. however!! here i am now!!

april started off with a blast. it was a fren's bday. was over at his house till the break of dawn! yakking n yakking away, having fun, laughing non stop, just pure hanging out with frens. came back home at 7am, n for some reason i couldnt sleep. got up about 10-ish, n was surprisingly awake! that is until i got to work..was so dead by the time i finished work at midnite. other than that, went for a movie outting with SAM (singapore association of monash). watched miss congeniality 2 for $5. pretty good deal eh? went shopping too!!! got myself a winter jacket for $50.

i'm gonna die from next week onwards! i've got assignments due non stop right till the end of semester! minimum 2 maximum 3 assignments EACH week!! crap!

my nerd score

Got to know about this site from a fren of mine. It's really cool..c how much of a nerd u r..as for me...


http://www.wxplotter.com/ft_nq.php?im

anyways, i'm really tired..i'll blog some other time.

Happy Easter everyone~!!!

*Wishing for the impossible*

Uni's started and i'm getting more and more busy by the day...although i don't have any assignments due as yet..just goin to uni n attending lectures n tutes makes me bz..ahhahaha.

Oh n yea..i'm wishing for the impossible..most of the things i want in life..it's almost impossible to get..i wouldn't say it's totally impossible to get..cos i know someway..somehow..someday..i MIGHT get it. But still..everything seems impossible at this very day..at this very moment..*sigh* How i wish life was much simpler than this..that life wouldn't be that harsh n cruel..that i would get a little more credit in life..

all wishes..but will they ever come true? i'm starting to have doubts..someone~~give me a sign, show me a light, reassure me..give me confidence..give me faith..give me..

I'm lost and confused

I'm in that particular stage in life, where i feel so lost n so confused. It's as if my life is missing something, something that makes life itself so meaningless. At this very moment, I'm not sure whether i'm doin the right things or even making the best choices and right decisions. Somehow, everything seems so foggy to me, as if a cloud has hovered over my head, blocking my view of everything. I believe what i need now, is some sort of sign, ANY sign, to give me reassurance, to show that i'm on the right path, that i am doin the right things for the right reasons. PLEASE GOD, give me a sign.

A friend told me, being a good student, a good daughter, an independent person, and a faithful servant of God, is reason enough to prove that i am on the right track in life. He also said (or something to that effect) that it's something good that we're worrying bout our future NOW, when some others are not even bothered about their future yet. Which elevates us to an upper hand..

Me~goin insane?!?!

Since i last blogged, a lot has been happening..but nothing particularly significant or bizarre enough to actually talk about - just little things. However, it is those little things in life that makes life much much more precious n meaningful. Don't u think so?

Anyhooo, in the past week or so, work has been taking up most of my time. Yet, that didn't bother me much cos many of my frens were not back from holidays yet. Now that uni's started, everyone's back, n i've been goin over to their houses more often. That's my resort to staying sane..as in my house, lights are out by 11pm (they work the next morning, that's y). In this case i get bored very very easily, so to get out of my world of boredom, hanging out at someone else's place is the key to sanity~!!

Snail's pace

Waiting for the days to pass is killing me~!! when i want time to pass at lightning speed it's passing at snail's pace. Counting down the days..n it seems so slow. *sigh* yet..it will still come.

*Praying that the days will go by faster than ever*

*That when i open my eyes, it will be it*

*Hoping that this will be something good*

*Anxiously waiting*

Chinese New Year

I've shifted into my new house already. It's much bigger than the old house i was staying in. On monday i had to get up early cos the table we bought from Freedom was scheduled for delivery on that morning. They said they were coming between 9-11am. So i had to wait n wait n wait for them cos they only came at bout 10:30. I actually dozed off waiting for them! I still couldn't sleep after the table came in. I had to wait for the foxtel ppl to come in and install foxtel. The technician came in at around 1pm. Poor him..he had such a hard time with the wiring. Apparently there was some problem with the wall. He spent at least 2 hours doin the wiring ONLY!! All in all, he finished the installation after at least 3 hours, which otherwise would have taken him only half the time. Anyway with foxtel installed, at least i have something to do at home. Otherwise i'm bored to death!

Was working Tuesday n Wednesday. Tuesday was alrite at work..just a normal nite. Wednesday however, being the first day of Chinese New Year, was ever so busy!! It was like everyone came in at the same time, so there was a bit of a rush. And for watever the reason it was, people seemed to drink a lot that nite. We sold scotch like no body's business~!!! We had a lot of mixers to make. Plus~!! we were serving *Yee Sang* so we had extra work n service to offer. We definitely had to talk more..explaining what the *Yee Sang* symbolizes n stuff regarding tradition n the chinese customs, bla bla bla.. LUCKILY i was working with Brenda, cos she knows exactly what she's doin. Anyhoo..dinner at work that nite was superb!! We had *Yee Sang*, long life noodles (or is it prosperity noodles~i'm not too sure) and CRAYFISH~!!!! (It's like lobster)WoohooO!!! It was SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO yummy!! Best dinner ever!

Happy Chinese New Year everyone!! Hope u have a happy n prosperous year ahead!!

Shifting house

I've been so busy shifting house that i don't even have the time to blog. The weekend was one hectic weekend! We had boxes n boxes of stuff to be moved..seemed neverending! Anyways, i'll blog again some time soon i hope.

To all Chinese, Wishing u a happy and prosperous chinese new year! hope the year of the rooster brings u good luck through out the year!

Best wishes!!

January's gone!!

With just a blink of the eye, and January is gone!! just like that..it seemed like just a few days ago that i was watching fireworks decorating the skies, welcoming the new year. Time sure flies! One month of 2005 has passed, and i have barely done anything. Just the same old same old. *sigh*

Anyhoo, got the keys to our new house today. Went over just now to check for damages, n i chose my room!! i booked my room..n no other can have that room!! ehhehe. i think it's a pretty cool house. spacious n everything. So, we'll be moving in this weekend with the help of our faithful friends!!

On a second note, i've been thinking a lot lately. Of only one thing. It bothers me to a certain extent. But on the other i hesitate to take a step forward. God please help me think straight.

Scaring the hell out of myself

As already noted, my house was burglared somewhere last week. On thursday morning, i got a phone call from my bro at work. I was still sleeping then..it was probably slightly past 11am. He told me to go to the window n that there was a car parked outside..with 2 guys in it..doin absolutely nothing..looking suspicious n all..he freaked the hell out of me! While i was peeping one of the guys actually saw me..n just fled off..right away! What made matters scarier was that i was all alone at home..for the whole day till both of them got back from work. So, me, all freaked out, was alone at home, with a metal rod on my right and a cricket bat on me left, restlessly watched tv. We went to the police station in Oakleigh when my bro got back from work, n told them bout this.

Friday was so blardy hot! Lee Ping came over to use the phone as hers was disconnected. Asked her is she was able to be at my house for about an hour or so while i was at work till my bro got back. So she did come over just before i left for work. So nice of her! At work, it was really really hot too..everyone was taking the opportunity to go to the cool room!! ahhah..was a very free nite..not many tables. Today at work was the same, wasn't busy at all. Nothing particularly interesting.

We're goin to IKEA tomorrow. Since we're gonna be moving house soon, we're goin furniture hunting! HEhhehe..hope to find nice nice things in IKEA!

Nites people.